Thursday, April 16, 2009

a Day in the life of......

What a day of ups and downs this was! We had a funeral to attend at 11, which means an early morning, 5 kiddos to feed, clean up and find clothes for......for those of you with one or two children...than means LOTS of time searching for socks that went astray somehow and matching shoes, which alone can make you lose your testimony.

I never eat on these days which adds to the mess of things, and once dad arrived home from work we were in the van and out the door. I, for the life of me, could NOT find the card that I got for this sweet wife who lost her husband which makes me even more agitated. (Why do we say they "lost" a loved one when we KNOW they are in heaven rejoicing????)

Anywhoo this was not a sad sad sad funeral. This sweet man had lived a full godly life and I was glad to exercise my New Year's resolution of rejoicing with those who God called home instead of sorrowing almost as bad as those who have no hope.

I closed my eyes for most of the trip to the funeral home mainly because I was trying to get into some "de-stressing" trance I guess and partly because my Husband insists on changing the routes on the Tom Tom while we are driving on the freeway at 60 MPH. I would have probably had a heart attack just knowing what my blood pressure reading was at that moment.

We are at the funeral home at last, and OF COURSE Joel has some sort of responsibility and has to rush to get in and find out the order of events, leaving me to comfort Nathan who just had his head closed in the side van door....thank you Isaac. So I am waddling behind, comforting Nathan, growling at Isaac and wiping the black mark from the rubber seal from the door off of Nathan's cheek all while waddling up what seemed to me like Mount Vesuvius.

We are in and settled in the ............WWWWAAAAAAAAYYYYY back. So far back that I embarrassingly even stood up to make sure there was a casket and we were indeed where we were supposed to be. THEN Hubby tells us that we have closer seating. let's just parade all of us AGAIN thru this mass of people and try to find other seats........just what I was thinking! Come to find out we were in some side room....the only ones in there, and with a straight shot to our dear friend in the casket, though everyone in the main room could not see us. This did prove to be a blessing.

Preacher is speaking, kids are wiggling in what HAS to be the crinkliest chairs I have ever beheld. They also partially collapse if you hang your legs off the sides and wiggle your hind parts out the back hole as we also were keen observers to. Preacher is speaking, kids are wiggling, and now jumping in and out of their seats, making ME jump out of my seat. Dad is singing, Anna is whining for him, and I am furiously searching for the Cheese Nips we packed away somewhere next to my Clinique makeup in my bag. So here we are, ducks in a row, Dad is up and down handing me Anna and taking her back. I am rationing out Cheese Nips and we are passing them in perfect assembly line. Of course most of us, yes I was eating them too, chewed them with a closed mouth, but thankfully the microphone drowned out the sound from our "East Wing." Then we were on to the raisins and I am rationing some, passing them, rationing some more and passing them each child knowing what to give whom. Then a kink in the works. Caleb decides to hoard two people's raisins which at this point was to me as the abomination of desolation to the family. A "you better not do that again, enjoy the raisins they are the last you will ever see," look seemed to correct the behavior and we were in fine form until the goods were gone. Yep we were gonna have to wing it from here on out.

Then since we were the Wing that was nearest the way out, EVERY SINGLE PERSON that came to pay their respects to our dear friend then came to parade by us on their way out! No hiding for this family. I was greeting and smiling at people I have never before seen in my lifetime, and though that normally would not be such a huge nerves were about shot......ok they WERE shot and made small talk undoable! Joel noticing my uncomfortableness told me to "Stare at some inanimate object" so as not to make eye contact almost drawing strangers to us. I had to laugh at this point while I stare away at the light fixtures!

Finally we were the LAST ones excused to see our dear friend and pay OUR respects. So it is just us and the immediate family. At which time one of mine, who will remain anonymous, but if you really know us you KNOW whom it was, speaks up, "Why did they say he was gonna be put in the ground within the hour??" That was it..........just get me a coffin right here and now and let me just give up whatever ghost I have left. I.WAS.MORTIFIED. The funeral director gave a wide, slightly spooky cheesy grin and I was headed to the car......back DOWN Vesuvius.

We (Hubby) had planned a date after the funeral which just as a head's up for ya, doesn't work. A date after all of that kerfuffle led to more frustrations. And Hubby then had a meeting to speak at....some men only thing like the Knights of P.E.I from Avonlea, where they all probably wore weird looking hats and Mr. T starting kit necklaces.

It is 10, the kids are in bed, I am reflecting and somewhat laughing and somewhat wincing over today's display of "family" and ready for a good night's rest!

Night all!


  1. My Sundays and Wednesdays are like that. The next day I almost always have a stress headache. When funerals or other church things come up, like PICTURES for a new directory, heaven help me, I'm with you on the "please, just let me DIE" thoughts.

    And I'm not even pregnant. I don't know how you do it all!

    Oh, and TWICE last week Nathan ended up wearing two left foot dress shoes to services which were discovered upon arrival. How do they stand that? I can just see the older ladies of the church, clicking their tongues and saying, "My, my, those poor Bothwell kids had to dress themselves for church again." and shaking their heads in pity.

  2. I know I'm tired, but I have tears of laughter streaming down my face!!! And what does happen to their shoes?? We once searched weeks for a pair of church shoes only to find them in the tote of dress up clothes! Guess that was logical to someone. All the while, my daughter just said, "It's okay mom. I'll just tell Nana, and she'll buy me a new pair!!" Hello, where is the character lesson in that?!?

    FYI: I love Sherri! She sounds like a kindred spirit. PS: I'll have to remember the staring at an inanimate object trick when I am mortified and want to crawl in a small hole!