tsk tsk (slapping wrist)
So much to tell. Let's just sum up that time by saying that the Holidays, really trying to enjoy the mystery of Christ coming for even me, Celebrating with family, Sending family far far away to the Mission field and four solid weeks of chicken pox has kept me busy.
Now if that doesn't beg for a pardon on my behalf, I am sunk.
In other news, I have had two very influential things happen to me this week and that brings me back to you all for a catch-up and a heart sketching.
One was the phone call that will not soon be forgotten, in which, a certain gal that will remain nameless, spoke life into these dry bones. Dry writing fingers to be exact.
She just spoke truth and love into me and just got me out of that spot that we all get into from time to time. Not going forward, not retreating, just.plain.stuck.
I think we each have a hand full of people who's words are worth their weight in gold to us. Everyone has an opinion, but this hand full, they mean something to us. If they are cross, we feel it deeply, if they are sure of something, we are sure of it, just from their enthusiasm.
This someone whom I adore, had no idea that their call would reach through the phone and give me that push that I needed for some time, followed by truth in who God has made me to be that enveloped me as a great, enormous hug does when you are down in the dumps. Sometimes you really can feel the blue leaving your body when someone dear to you loves on you in that way.
The way they did for me.
And sometimes it is easier to allow something to really stick and sink down into you when you aren't face to face, reading every eye movement, every glance, every smile. You can just stare out the window and let it take root in your heart, and not be embarrassed when they see it move you.
Have you been there, friend??
And so here I am, back anew to share that God is amazing and each of us are uniquely qualified to bring Him an amazing source of joy. I cannot bring Him glory just like you can. You are unique to Him. And this uniqueness was never more understood to me than today.
You see, I got a hair cut.
I had that "I HAVE to do something with this" feeling about my hair that can come upon us females as a craving for an expectant mother. One that will stop you dead in your tracks and make you head over to the computer to indeed see if your checking account can aid you in your mission.
One that will prompt you to ask a friend to drive you over a coupon saving you yet a few dollars more, totally sealing the deal for you. You know what you need to do. Lunch can wait, dishes can wait, make-up can NOT wait and at last you are bounded for that corner place and in your head you are just praying that your Stylist has most of her teeth and only one tattoo.
I was in luck. A full set, and not-a-one.
I gave her the, "I think it would look nice a certain way, but have no idea how to explain that in stylish terms" smile.
She seemed to understand.
A year or so ago when I was in the same predicament, I asked the same question that our husband's love, "How do you want me to do my hair." And this particular day the response was precise and freeing.
He liked it short.
Well Hallelujah for that.
Thus began my search for something that was "me." This led to one evening of me on the phone with a friend who was helping me get ready for a huge event that would have me and the family reuniting with college friends after 14 years. No pressure. Not an ounce. Ok a LOT of pressure. Ok, lots of phone counseling.
This friend finally basically dared me to wear my hair with my bangs pinned to the side. Yeah, full-forehead.
I know, I was shocked too. I called it "Shock and Awe." As in, "I know your are shocked, and Awe, why did you have to dare me to do this! "And something amazing happened, It was freeing. It was me. It was what my husband liked and I finally was free of them. The... bangs I mean.
Now back to the salon...
This sweet gal has never worked faster or harder for twelve fifty. Hey, I had a coupon! I won't even mention that she didn't even wash my hair. This was diff-er-ent. She listened to me him and haw about what I thought would look nice and got that look in her eye that made me think she knew what I was rambling about. Either that or she was regretting the fact that I had used the coupon after all. THIS is why you WAIT to say you are using a coupon. When will a tightwad like me ever learn?????
She trimmed, and I would stop here and there to locate my glasses and check things out. Yes, I felt like an old lady. But without them I just saw what seemed to me like the outline of a chia pet. So, old lady or not, I hunted for them.
In no time flat I was headed out the door. And it was there that the feeling grabbed a hold of me. You know the one where everything is in slow motion and you feel like Esau did when he gave away his birthright? The one where each passerby seems to KNOW that you decided on not paying the extra three dollars for a blow-dry and style???!
I had some errands to run before heading home for dinner and while out, my hair began to sporadically dry in different sections. Maybe I should say, "fluff" in different sections....
I caught a glimpse of it in the frozen food isle glass and wondered where on earth I was going to have to hide for two or three months!
Ok, ok, it wasn't THAT bad, but you know that feeling, right???
At dinner my husband didn't even notice! This is good or bad. Good that it doesn't look as crazy different as you had previously felt, or bad because he has lost almost all of his peripheral vision.
I chose the former.
Once he does see it, he likes it. Scratch that, he loves it. Yes, he really said that. Those words just leaped out of his mouth.
It is at this very moment that you begin to take a tally on one hand of those tried and true friends who will stick with you. The rest you feel you can avoid to some extent... and you surely can avoid a facebook picture for a month or....seven...?
Then, while I was doing absolutely nothing today, the thought occurred to me that I had never even decided if I liked my hair! I was too busy worrying about what everyone else would think that I had thrown my own thoughts about it out the window! And you know what??
I like it! Scratch that, I love it. I LOVE MY HAIR! I may even get myself a bumper sticker and spread the message that self-loathing is for the birds. Something, we women, made in GOD'S image should throw to the curb. Enough with that! Be uniquely YOU!
I love my hair because it is fun.
I love my hair because it is something I would probably never do unless I was on a deserted island and was able to change my appearance without anyone around. You know, like finally grow your eyebrows out.... you've never thought of that???? Ok, just forget you ever read that, will you?
I love my hair because it's me. It's unique and that's just dandy.
I love my hair because my husband fancies it.
I just love.my.hair.
And I am determined to keep on loving it, any way I grow it, cut it, or style it. A bad hair day has been replaced with a "uniquely created" day!
A few days pass and I was listening to someone online speak truth again to this heart of mine. She was reminding me how God loves us because we are his. He doesn't love us because of what we have to offer him, or what we will become. He loves us because we are HIS. Two truths sent right from God to this heart of mine in one week. I am grateful and blessed! I soak it all in. Friend, you are uniquely created in God's image. I am created in God's image and can bring him glory and joy. And I tend to think that He loves my forehead.
You are loved, and you are so so lovely, friend.
Do you know that?
I mean REALLY know that?
It might just be time for a trim......